


All I Want For Christmas Is For You To Meet My Family

by deanisthesun (become_normal)



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Angst, Christmas, Coming Out, M/M, shaddap it ends happy
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-12-22
Updated: 2014-12-22
Packaged: 2018-03-02 21:38:38
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,190
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2826962
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/become_normal/pseuds/deanisthesun
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>"If you can't say it at Christmas, when can you?" - Love Actually</p>
            </blockquote>





	All I Want For Christmas Is For You To Meet My Family

For the past four years in a row, Sammy has brought home a different girl for Christmas.

First, there was Sarah. Smart, pretty, funny; but they just couldn't do long distance and so, it ended. Then, there was the feisty Madison, who got along with everyone well but their relationship, for reasons Sam still refuses to tell their mother, didn't last too long after that. Then _\- oh then –_ it was Ruby which resulted in the most memorable and horrific Christmas in probably forever and was politely dumped a week later. Last year was Amelia, which was more than a fling than anything and Dean secretly thinks was brought along just to keep up Sammy's ladies-man reputation.

Which is why Dean is surprised to hear from his mother over the phone two weeks before Christmas that Sam is coming alone this year. So surprised, in fact, that when his mother laughs and says 'so if there's a pretty girl _you_ want to bring home for the holidays, we've got an empty space', Dean says...

"Actually there is someone I'd like to bring home."

He doesn't know why he said it.

He wants to blame the shock of hearing his brother hasn't found some gorgeous girl to sweep off her feet this year, or maybe the beer he had with dinner is clouding his head, but maybe deep down he just really wants his mom to finally know.

See, Dean has never brought anyone home for Christmas. Oh there've been people, for sure. People he really cared about, and relationships that might have been love. But he always knew that one day they'd end. That they were never gonna be forever. And he just didn't want to disappoint his family by admitting that.

Maybe it also had to do with the fact that some of them were guys, and Dean's not really... well his parents don't... he just hasn't figured out how to tell everyone yet.

Sammy knows of course, as if he could keep anything from that kid, but no one else that'll be there for Christmas.

"Really, sweetheart?" his mom sounds surprised and hopeful, like she didn't actually think he was going to take her up on the offer. Neither did he until he said it. "What's her name?"

"Actually mom," he feels his throat begin to close up and he coughs dryly to clear it. " _His_ name is Cas."

The silence is deafening, at least to Dean it is. Every other insignificant noise in the room - the ticking of his living room clock, the fuzzy feedback noise through his phone, the loud thump of his racing heart - is amplified times a million. Until finally his mom goes, "Oh. What's that short for?"

Dean double takes. "Its uhh... its Castiel. His name's Castiel. His family's like really religious and he's named after some sorta angel or something but they're not big on Christmas which I think is weird but they're kinda Amish so maybe not but he's got nowhere to go so I was hoping maybe - mom, I'm bisexual. Is that... is that okay?"

He's clutching his phone so hard he thinks it might snap but its all he can do to keep from shaking so hard he'll pass out. Mary sighs warmly through the receiver. He doesn't know how anyone can sigh warmly through a goddamn phone but if someone can, it’s his mom.

"Dean darling, there is nothing you could be or do that would make me stop loving you with my whole heart, so if that's what you're worried about you've got to stop sweety." Dean let's out a rattling breath, letting hot tears flow freely down his cheeks as he narrows his hearing to his mother's soft voice alone, tuning out everything else. "You will always be my little angel, and by the sounds of it now you've got your own. If it just happens to be a man with a unique name who's got my little boy all starry eyed and tongue tied, then that's as good as anything." Dean sucks in a deep breath and clutches at his chest, trying to rub away the knot tightening around his heart. "He sounds very interesting and I am excited to meet him."

"And dad and grandma?" He sniffs, hating how much he sounds like a little boy. "Are they gonna be happy about this too?"

"You listen to me, Dean Winchester," Mary says sternly, "if your grandmother accepted it when I dragged that scoundrel you call a father to Christmas dinner, she will damn well accept whatever smart, strapping young man you will bring home." They share a laugh at that. "And your father loves you, Dean. As much as I do. He might not show it in the right ways, but that man loves you boys more than the world itself. He will be more okay with this than you think."

Dean nods along with that, even though his mom can't see it he hopes she knows that he understands. "Thanks mom." he whispers.

"Anything for my little teddy bear." she coos.

"Mooooom...." Dean groans, blushing at the childhood nickname although there's no one there to see him embarrassed. Mary's sweet laughs echoes through the phone and the sound of it makes him feel better already.

"Alright darling I've got to get up early for work tomorrow, its my last day and the kids are putting on a little Christmas concert for the school and I need to bring in these last minute costumes early."

"Oh, okay." Dean picks at a loose thread on the sleeve of his flannel shirt. He was hoping to stay up a little longer with his mom and talk until she made everything absolutely better. He still feels a little vulnerable about all this. Like his skin's been flayed open and all his nerves exposed.

"I will inform everyone of this addition to our table, but I think that you reserve the right to explain the details of your sexual orientation to whomever you wish." Mary says seriously.

"Thank you. _Thank you, mom_." he croaks out and he's never meant it more in his life.

"Of course, Dean. Goodnight sweetheart, I can't wait to see you boys at Christmas." says Mary.

"Me too. Goodnight mom. I love you."

"Love you too."

The line clicks off and he drops his phone onto his couch like its made of hot coals. His hands slap over his mouth, his breath coming in quick puffs and he tries to calm his heart with no success.

It’s done. It’s over. And it’s all... okay. And he should feel okay, but he doesn't. God he wants to, but he just feels...sensitive. Physically, like his favorite shirt even scratches uncomfortably against his raw skin, and emotionally, like someone could insult his left eyebrow and he'd probably cry like a little baby.

He just wants someone. Someone to tell him its okay to not be okay, but also someone who's gonna make all these not-okay feelings go away. He just wants...

He wants Cas. Right here, right now. Which is good, because he only lives a couple minutes away.

Dean picks his phone back up and unlocks it, opening up the messaging app and shooting off a quick **' _can I come over_ '** to his boyfriend of ten months.

It’s not late, and Cas is a notorious night owl, so he should still be-

**_'Of course. You OK?'_ **

Dean breathes a sigh of relief and jumps up off the couch, jogging to the front door and pulling on his coat.

**_'yep, just wanna see ya. got good news.'_ **

**_'sorta???'_ **

He grabs his keys and bolts out the door, practically throwing himself into his car parked out front and speeding off down the street.

The car ride isn't nearly long enough to give him time to calm the hell down before he gets there. Even with the slowed down speed the icy roads force him to go at, he arrives in ten minutes flat and finds parking just down the block.

The biting December cold slows his speeding heart marginally as he walks from the car to the front door of the small townhouse Cas is renting. But the moments between ringing the doorbell and the red wooden door creaking open, turn his heart rate back up to eleven.

Cas is already dressed for bed, wearing one of Dean's old Zeppelin T-shirts and a pair of loose grey sweatpants. The thick-framed glasses perched on his nose mean he's even taken out his contacts already. Dean almost feels bad about keeping him up late when he's obviously tired, but the open, worried expression etched into his gorgeous features alone, reassure Dean that his presence is welcome.

Not to mention those eyes.

God, he gets lost in those eyes so easily. Entire oceans and waves must live in those blue orbs, and Dean is a mere a sailor at sea, tossed about in his small rickety boat against the current of the waves.

Without preamble Dean blurts out, "You're invited to Christmas dinner." with a hollow laugh and Cas knows exactly what that must mean.

"Dean." Cas's shoulders drop, his eyes go wide and sad behind his glasses, and a moment later narrow to a determined stare.

Cas pulls him through the door by the lapels of his jacket and shuts the door behind him. He zips the jacket down and Dean let's him pull it off his shoulders as he toes off his own shoes. He tosses the jacket over the small chair that sits in the entryway and turns to Dean with concerned eyes.

Dean feels like he's on the precipice, about to fall, and holding on by the tips of his fingers. "I just... I just need. I need you to hold me."

Cas nods once and steps forward to bring Dean into his arms and finally, _finally_ , Dean just let's himself break.

He sobs into Cas's shoulder and clutches at the worn T-shirt against his back. Cas rubs small circles around his spine and whispers quiet words into his ear. Things like, ' _I'm here_ ' and, ' _you're safe_ ' and, ' _I am so proud of you_ ' and every other thing Dean didn't realize he needed to hear until they came tumbling out of Cas's perfect mouth.

Dean closes his eyes and let's the world fall away, so that nothing exists except him and Cas and every promise whispered between them.

Eventually, he lets Cas drag him to his room and pull off the rest of his clothing until he's laid bare before him. He asks Cas to join him in his nudity. Not to fulfill any sexual desires; he just wants to be as close to him as possible.

When they crawl until the covers of Cas's bed together, not a stitch between them, he's glad Cas complied. Cas pulls off his glasses, sets them on the bedside table, and switches off the light.

They lie facing each other on the bed, their hands entwined between them and Dean seeks out Cas's gaze in the dark room.

"I came out to my mom." he whispers. Saying it aloud makes it so real, so definite. But saying it here, in the dark cocoon of Cas's warm room, under his loving gaze, he feels safe. "She's gonna tell everyone else. Not details but... that were together."

"So, Christmas?" Cas probes, his deep voice rumbling through the room.

"Mhmm." Dean nods tiredly. "Sammy's got no girl to bring home this year, my mom was joking that I should instead. Then it just... wasn't a joke. I realized I wanted you to be there, more than anything. Guess I should've properly asked you first though, huh." he tried to play it off as a joke and finds himself too tired to laugh. Cas shuffles a couple inches closer.

"There is nowhere I'd rather be on Christmas than with you, Dean. And I am thrilled to finally meet your family." He says it with the utmost sincerity and Dean believes him unconditionally. He let's himself drift a little closer to sleep. "Plus, I am of course honored to be the first pretty girl you've ever brought home for Christmas." Dean sees him grin in the dark, his eyelids falling closed over his blue irises. He looks so beautiful and peaceful in that moment, and Dean is so overcome with adoration for this man lying before him, that he realizes he needs to correct him. Tonight is, apparently, his longest confessional.

"Only." Dean whispers.

"Hmmm?" Cas hums, his eyes flitting back open. Dean uncurls his hands from Cas's to cup his rough jaw between them, bringing their foreheads together with a soft bump.

"You're the only person I ever want to bring home for Christmas."

Cas's breath hitches and a glorious grin spreads across his face. He presses the softest of kisses to Dean's lips, cheek, and forehead before returning to eye level.

"I love you too, Dean Winchester."

Dean curls into Cas's warm chest, tucking his head under his boyfriend's chin, and allows Cas’s strong arms to wrap around him, and drifts peacefully asleep.

**Author's Note:**

> hit me up on tumblr @deanisthesun. Happy Holidays everyone!!!


End file.
